Unchanging In A Changing World

The news in the last couple of days has been the arrival of Jeff Bezos to Bangalore, India. Watching the flamboyance that comes from the founder of Amazon is almost reminiscent of Richard Branson and Virgin Atlantic – riding on a lorry, flashing a check, meeting the press, the whole theatrical style. But what has been interesting, even in the interview that I was reading in The Times of India and The Economic Times, is that he used the word 'customer-centric' at least thirty times in the interview, according to the person who interviewed him. He said, "We stay focused on the customer, not the competition. It's the customer who pays us, not our rivals." What a wonderful quote!

 

This reminded me of an article I read about Roberto Goizueta, who took over as CEO of Coca-Cola in the 1980s. At that time, Pepsi was coming to the fore and all his executives were Pepsi-focused and focused on increasing market share by 0.1% at a time. Roberto met his executives and said; "I think we've got it all wrong. Let's change the equation. Let's ask a different question. What's the average fluid intake of an American per day?"

The answer came back, "Fourteen ounces."

The next question, "What is Coke's share of that?"

The answer, "Two ounces."

"That," Roberto said, "is where we need to focus. We need to figure out how to get that remaining 12 ounces to Coke. Our competition isn't Pepsi. It's the water, tea, coffee, milk and fruit juices that went into the remaining 12 ounces."

That was what galvanized Coke to go far ahead of Pepsi; they ended up putting vending machines in every street corner, sales took a quantum leap and Pepsi has never quite caught up.

But Roberto realized how to be customer-centric and think about the customer and not to concentrate on the rivals.

 

As I continued to read the interview, I found another interesting part. Bezos says, "In the midst of all the change that is going on, what is it that will stay stable?" The question asked was "What was going to change in the next ten years?" He says, "For me, the real question is: What's not going to change? I know the answer at least from the Indian point of view. The Indian customer, ten years from now will want the same things: vast selection, fair, competitive prices and faster, reliable delivery. That's not going to change; only the quantum will change. What the customer needs stays the same."

 

It kind of brought this balance to me. On one hand we live in such a fast changing world. Everything seems to be in a state of flux. Yet, on the other hand, there are people who say to watch and find out where the calm is.

 

Harvard Business School professor, Rosabeth Moss Kanter once said, "Successful companies must develop a culture that keeps moving all the time." When you take that and add it to the equation that both Roberto and Jeff Bezos are talking about, it seems that in the midst of this kind of disruptive economy where change is so normal, one should be able to find the stable points and optimize those stable points.

 

As I pushed that even further, here's where I think it has some relevance for you and me. As we look at stable points, it comes down to people. Good leadership is also about stability. The first Dean of Harvard Business School, Edwin Frances Gay described leadership as: "Courage, judgment, character and an ability to get things done." Not much has changed in the past 100 years. The same qualities still ring true. People, if they are anchored well, don't change. This made me think that if we want to have stability in a fast-changing world, look for people who have good character, people who are well focused.

 

Matthew Kelly in his book, "Off Balance" says, "Continuous change is now an accepted part of life and business. The waves of change are constantly crashing on the shore of our lives. But it is a well-defined value structure that allows us to thrive in the midst of the change." It is the unchanging that allows us to make sense of the change. As we look at it, more and more, it's people with character, strong values that are the unchanging force in today's changing world.

 

Applied vision had this blog and I want to read it verbatim. "What I have experienced with people in all parts of the world – from different cultural and religious backgrounds is the expressed qualities and shared values of family, love, kindness, hospitality, friendship, generosity, fun and humor – being upheld and treasured, despite what is happening in the world around them. Some things aren't meant to change. In these times of rapid change, there is a great need for people who can maintain their equanimity in the midst of earthquakes, nuclear disasters or bank collapses that may come. These people radiate a calming energy that impacts on all around them."

 

So here's the movement today – from being customer-centric, which has to do with profits and stability in the market place, to just stability for you and me in terms of our own selves, looking for that one commodity, one resource which is good value-centered, character-filled people. I submit to you today – that's who we need to invest in, to surround ourselves with those kind of people. On a horizontal level, that's whom we need to concentrate on, but on a vertical level, there is no better place to be anchored than in an unchanging God, the same yesterday, today and forever. That's my hope and my prayer for all of you on this call.

 

May I pray with you? Almighty God, bless everyone on this call, everyone who will listen to this. Help us to concentrate on the important things in life. Help us to build good character and values. Help us to be assets to people around us and help us to connect with you, Unchanging God, who will bring stability into our very lives. In Jesus' precious name, we pray these things. Amen.

 

•       Meet the Everything Man," http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/tech/tech-news/The-everything-man/articleshow/43743647.cms?

•       Roberto Goizueta, http://www.google.co.in/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=6&ved=0CDwQFjAF&url=http%3A%2F%2Fncr.mae.ufl.edu%2Ffunstuff%2FTeamwork.ppt&ei=13MqVJSyF5SjuQTP24KQBg&usg=AFQjCNGIRb5_jOvRvTmXJvoDL_V4jFFTWw&bvm=bv.76477589,d.c2E

•       "Tips--A Call to Peace," http://www.appliedvision.com.au/tips/

•       Leadership for the 21st Century, First Dean of Harvard Business School: Edwin Frances Gay. http://www.hbs.edu/centennial/businesssummit/leadership/leadership-for-the-21st-century.html

•       Matthew Kelly, "Off Balance," http://books.google.co.in/books?id=GFCL_7GjQ4wC&pg=PT43&lpg=PT43&dq=unchanging+in+the+midst+of+change&source=bl&ots=8YnRnlBunJ&sig=J-9_QGTXemr4Rb2qU3THnjrxuQE&hl=en&sa=X&ei=3vgpVK7PIY7Y8gWdz4HoDw&ved=0CDsQ6AEwBQ#v=onepage&q=unchanging%20in%20the%20midst%20of%20change&f=false

•       John Jones, DeAnne Aguirre and Matthew Calderone, quoting Rosabeth Moss Kanter in "10 Principles of Change Management."http://www.strategy-business.com/article/rr00006?pg=all

•       Unchanging God reference taken from Hebrews 13:8

Not Just Yet

Before I start the talk, I want to speak a blessing over you all and I pray that the Almighty God would bless you abundantly in all that you do, today, with your family and in your work and life. My prayers are with you and over you.

 

A couple of weeks back I remember putting off doing something, until the window that I had to do that passed and it was too late. I remember feeling so bad about it – was really upset with myself, angry, frustrated and all the other emotions that come with knowing that you ought to have done something and didn't do it. Now it was too late.

 

I came across this article by Rick Warren on "Why Do I Procrastinate?" that put this in perspective, because basically, that's what I did. Interestingly, he had a verse from our Holy Book: "Anyone who knows the good he ought to do and doesn't do it, sins." (James 4:17) This put it in a new perspective for me. Basically, the Bible is saying that if we know that we have to do something and we don't do it, then we're really making a big mistake. It's not something that God would want us to do; that's what sin is. In the article, he gave five reasons for procrastination. I thought that I'd throw these out to see and see if it triggers something in you, because we all tend to procrastinate.

 

Psychology Today says, "Everyone procrastinates sometimes, but 20% of people chronically avoid difficult tasks and deliberately look for distractions." So there's the possibility that we could be among that 20%.

 

The five reasons:

 

1.     Indecision: not to be decisive, not sure of when to act. The Scriptures say, "A double minded man is unstable in all he does." (James 1:8)

 

2.     Perfectionism: waiting till you get it absolutely right. "If you wait for perfect conditions, you'll never get anything done." (Ecclesiastes 11:4) We wait for the right time, the right moment, the right circumstance or situation and it never comes and the moment passes.

 

3.     Fear. "The fear of man is a trap." (Proverbs 29:25) We put off things like going to the dentist, or getting a surgery done, or going for marriage counseling because we are fearful of it. The fear of doing something prevents us from actually doing it.

 

4.     Anger. That can be a deterrent. We are angry about something and put off taking a decision about an issue that we need to deal with.

 

5.     Laziness: just not doing it.

 

He ends that article by saying, "The next time you find yourself procrastinating, stop and ask yourself why." Maybe run yourself through that 5-point grid and see if any of these are the reason.

 

Joshua R. Ferrari wrote a book 'Getting Things Done On Time: Conquering Procrastination'. In it he says, "A procrastinator typically has five tendencies or traits:

 

1.     They overestimate the time they have left to perform tasks.

2.     Or conversely, they underestimate the time it takes to complete tasks.

3.     They overestimate how motivated they will feel the next day, the next week, the next month to do whatever they are putting off. They think they will be better motivated at some other point.

4.     They mistakenly think that succeeding at a task requires that they feel like doing it. "I may not feel like it so I'll wait until the feeling comes along," and we all know that it never comes.

5.     They mistakenly believe that working when not in the mood is sub-optimal. If you're not in the mood to do something, you will not do good work.

 

You and I have gone down that path before and we recognize why we do things. We may not be able to understand how to overcome that, but knowing that there is a reason why we do something is the starting point in being able to tackle that particular area and move with it.

 

I love what Theodore Roosevelt said, "In a moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing. The worst thing you can do is nothing." That's so true! We procrastinate, we tend to wait till the last minute, then before we know it, that last minute has come and gone.

 

I came across an article by Vineet Nayar, which plays the devil's advocate on procrastination. He writes in HBR Blog, "Speed Kills. Slow Is Fast." In it he says, "Most of us believe that speedy decision-making is critical for success today, and dub its absence as procrastination or managerial dithering. However, by focusing on how quickly we make decisions, are we abandoning the need to listen, discuss, evaluate and respect different points of view?" He's making a very valid point. He is saying, "Take the time that you need to decide, but the moment that you decide, act very quickly." Take your time deciding, but once the decision is made, act on it.

 

There's a lovely book by Frank Partnoy called "WAIT – The Art & Science Of Delay." In it, he talks about how it is so important to wait till the last minute in terms of a decision, but then, to act quickly.

 

Many years ago, I was playing table tennis with a friend who was an excellent player. Within a couple of minutes I realized that I was getting the trashing of my life. I asked him to give me some pointers on how to improve my game. I'll never forget what he said. He told me, "You rush to meet the ball. Don't do that. Wait till the ball comes to you. That's what gives you the extra time to decide what to do with the ball, where to place it, how to place it, what kind of spin to put on it – all this because you have a little bit more time.

 

Frank Partnoy, in his YouTube video says, "Most tennis players have about 500 milliseconds from the time somebody serves to the time they react. 200 of those milliseconds go in seeing the ball and 15 milliseconds go in hitting the ball. The remaining 285 are what they use to prepare." That's very useful information, isn't it? While we sometimes lump everything in the area of procrastination, both Vineet Nayar and Frank Partnoy seem to say that there is some good in waiting. To be able to wait just that little longer before we act on something, to find out if it is the best decision that we are making. In fact, Frank Partnoy says, "Find out the time frame for the decision, and then make it at the last possible moment." Find out what time frame you have, whether it's an hour, a day or a week. Don't rush in to make the decision but wait till the end to make that decision. Then as Vineet Nayar would put it, "Act fast after that decision is made."

 

He ends his interview by saying; "We need to get comfortable with delay." I like that! Even as I thought about procrastination, they are so right. We think the opposite of procrastination is jumping in and making quick decisions, when it really is not. Sometimes it is better to wait, understanding the time frame we have to make a particular decision and then only, making it.

 

Well, I think that's a good word for each of us to look at why we don't act, maybe and say, "If I am procrastinating, then why am I procrastinating? Am I being indecisive, am I being a perfectionist? Is anger or laziness or fear playing a role?" Ask yourself why and then ask God to help you overcome it and move forward. But if you are one who typically jumps the gun on things, maybe it's a good thing to take a little bit more time, understand all that there is and then take the decision. Having taken the decision, then act on the decision immediately.

 

My prayer is that God would give us wisdom to know clearly where we are in this entire spectrum. Let me pray with you. Almighty God, bless each one of us and help us to really understand what we are doing in our lives, whether we are procrastinating or not, whether we are making hasty decisions. Give us the wisdom to make right decisions. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen.

 

•       Rick Warren, "Why do I Procrastinate,"  http://www.psychologytoday.com/basics/procrastination

•       Vineet Nayar, "Speed Kills, Slow is Fast."  http://blogs.hbr.org/hbr/nayar/2010/11/speed-kills-slow-is-fast.html

•       Frank Partnoy, "WAIT--The Art & Science of Delay,"

•       Joshua R. Ferrari, "Getting things done on Time: Conquering Procrastination" New York: Oxford University Press, 2001 (pp 30-46).

 

Self-Deprecation

I've been thinking a lot about self-deprecating humor. I don't know whether it is something you have ever thought about, but it came to the forefront when I was watching a movie called 'The Great Debaters'. It was basically a movie where 3 guys and a girl were being trained to debate. This was in a totally black university, Wiley College, and how the person in charge of the debating team, played by Denzel Washington, took them through training and made them believe in themselves. Finally they went up against Harvard debating team and won. It is a great movie. There were a couple of lines in it that really got my attention. When he is training these guys, one of them stands up and makes a disparaging remark about himself in the course of introducing the subject. Immediately Denzel Washington stops him and says, "Would you punch yourself in a street fight, Mr. Burgess?" The guys answers, "No, sir!" He says, "Then don't punch yourself in a word fight. You don't have to make fun of yourself."

 

It made me think that sometimes we can use self-deprecating humor on ourselves and think that it will earn us Brownie points. And it may. But at other times, the potential of being self-deprecating is that it may work against you.

 

What would be self-deprecating? I was trying to anchor it in an explanation. "Some people are egotistical – always talking about how great they are. The opposite type of person is self-deprecating – dwelling on his/her own faults and even joking about how they are short, unsuccessful or not that smart. Being self-deprecating is usually considered a good trait (the key word here is usually), a quality of someone with a wry sense of humor. When being self-deprecating goes too far however, it can become self-loathing and self-sabotaging, which are less amusing forms of putting yourself down." That's the definition that comes out of vocabulary.com. But it brings about a delineation between being absolutely confident about who you are and being self-deprecating which could be a good thing. But if carried too far, can get to a point where you become self-loathing and don't think too much of yourself.

 

Saranya Kapur in businessinsider.in was quoting somebody in an article and said, "Self-deprecation is only dangerous if there is any chance at all that the person you are talking to might agree with it." How true! If you are being self-deprecating and saying, "Well, I am really not that good," and somebody else is listening and thinking, "Yeah, I agree with that assumption or that assessment. Then you are not in a good place because you have already sold yourself short and people believe it.

 

Lucy Kellaway said, "So long as there is no doubt about the status and superiority of the person using it, self-deprecation is one of the most effective tools there is." If there is no doubt about who you are, about the status and superiority of the person, then there is no problem using it. But if there is, then you're on dangerous ground. This makes be think that it's got to be used more after you've achieved some degree of status and success and people respect you for self-deprecation to work. Because when you haven't and you use it, it conveys the fact that here is a person who is completely insecure with whom they are.

 

In response to this article, there were a couple of comments. One person said about Golda Meir, the former Israeli Prime Minister, that she was chairing a cabinet meeting and a minister who deeply disagreed with her policy that he might not be intelligent enough unlike the others in the room to grasp the concepts that she was outlining. After listening to him for several minutes she said, "You shouldn't feign modesty. You were never that good to begin with." Ouch! While trying to act like you are not intelligent, you really got slammed by someone who took that very seriously and put you down.

 

As Scott Rasmussen says, "When you talk about self-deprecation, it's not a novel trait. It used to be called false modesty and is commonly associated with narcissists. It's really self-promotion by stealth." Good use of words! You're quietly trying to push yourself forward while being self-deprecating. Or is it even stealthy?

 

All this made me think: we all use self-deprecating humor, don't we? It made me ask the question: Is it working for us or is it working against us? I remember many years ago, I was asked to sing a song at my college and I went to an accompanist and said, "Would you play for me?" He was one of the finest pianists in the college. He listened to the song and said that he was not very good at it. I interjected and told him that he was the best pianist I ever heard. He stopped me and said, "I'm not in any way minimizing my talent as a pianist. I'm just saying that I'm not used to this particular genre and therefore I'll have to work hard at it." I thought to myself that here was a guy who was very confident about his ability as a pianist. When he said something, it was in no way disparaging of his talent. Yet, he was able to speak about his weakness.

 

Domino's Pizza, in 2008, brought out what has been touted in the media and business world and a self-deprecating advertisement. They aired all the things that their critics said about their pizza, from the kind of sauce they used, tomato ketchup to the crust being like cardboard. Then they started talking about the new pizza they were bringing in. it worked like a charm for them. It increased their sales. But as you think about it, does it really work for you? It's good to take a bit of a pause and ask ourselves, "When I knock myself, is it helping me or is it belittling me to the people I am talking to?" that's a good question to ask, because sometimes we use these tools in our vocabulary without really thinking of how it can actually work as a negative rather than as a positive.

 

Brynna Gabrielson says, "After years of self-deprecating behavior, I've never learned how to properly talk a compliment. A part of me wants to argue with him, to tell him there's nothing special about me." That's the other end! We can get to a point where we're so self-deprecating, we are so good at putting ourselves down that when we get a compliment, we just don't know how to take it.

 

What would be a good balance? I think in terms of what our Scriptures say: "I am made in the image of God." Humility is fine but not to knock that image. That would be the litmus test for me, that if I ever get to knock something that God has made and which He pronounced good and bears His image – that's not good for me.

 

That's my thought for you this morning. Look at how you use self-deprecating humor. Ask the question: Are you demeaning yourself or are you furthering yourself?

 

Can I pray with you? Almighty God. Give us wisdom and discernment to be able to look at the way we use self-deprecating humor and always to make sure that we never knock the fact that we are made in Your image and therefore, good and yet to be able to know the difference. I pray that wisdom for each one on this call in the precious name of Jesus. Amen.

 

•       The Great Debaters, http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0427309/

•       "Self-deprecating" meaning. http://www.vocabulary.com/dictionary/self-deprecating

•       Saranya Kapur, "How Self-deprecating Jokes Can Backfire." http://www.businessinsider.in/How-Self-Deprecating-Jokes-Can-Backfire/articleshow/25811316.cms

•       Lucy Kellaway, "Why it is very clever to pretend to be stupid," http://www.ft.com/intl/cms/s/0/fdbc8282-4859-11e3-a3ef-00144feabdc0.html#axzz3DRJJMeAq

•       Samuel Passow, "Feigning Modesty can Backfire on You." http://www.ft.com/intl/cms/s/0/746aec30-4b01-11e3-ac3d-00144feabdc0.html#axzz3DRJJMeAq

•       Scott Rasmussen, Some aren't fooled by false modesty." http://www.ft.com/intl/cms/s/0/92eaafac-4e07-11e3-8fa5-00144feabdc0.html#axzz3DRJJMeAq

•       Brynna Gabrielson, quote on self-deprecation.  http://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/self-deprecation

 

Empathy@Work

While travelling, I got to spend some time with my son Ranjo. I remember coming out of a meeting that he was involved in and getting the car, when a man came running out and signaled to me to stop. I got out and he asked me, "Are you Ranjo's dad?" I replied, "Yes I am." He then said, "I want to thank you for him. I love him to death." Then he said something that really surprised me. He said, "I would take a bullet for him," adding jokingly, "but not in my vitals."

 

But that one statement really made me think about the kind of relationship that my son had with this man. Ranjo has this ability to connect with people. Forgive me for bringing my son into this but it makes my point. Over the years I have seen him reach out to people, understanding their situations. I remember when he got a new car. I asked him what he would do with his old one and he said that he was going to give it to a guy who was in this situation where he kept missing classes because his stepfather wouldn't drive him to college.

 

It made me think about the kind of relationship that allows us to think empathetically about every situation. Simon Sinek in his new book 'Leaders Eat Last' says, "Empathy is something that is vital not only to relationships but to organizations doing well." He talks about the army and the marines and how seniors always eat last allowing juniors to eat first. He asks the question: "How many times have you heard this phrase – because they would have done it for me when asked why do you do something?" that's empathy. That's building an empathic relationship with people.

 

So curious about empathy in the market place I began to look at a couple of articles and found how important empathy is beginning to be in the market place. Jason Boyers writes in Forbes in an article entitled 'Empathy in the Market Place'. He says, "Without growth and innovation, businesses stagnate and actually fade away. Growth and innovation is fostered by empathic relationships within the organization."

 

Innovation and creativity is so important today and these are unleashed when there is empathy in the work place. We are all waiting very eagerly for what Tim Cook will release what Apple has been promising what will be revolutionary if not evolutionary in terms of their product line. But innovation is the key. We wait for innovation. How do you develop empathy? One way, as Jason Boyers would say, is "learning to understand, respect and implement another individual's point of view rather than forcing your own way."

 

How different is empathy from sympathy? Very, very different. Sarah Shields, Executive Director and General Manager of Dell, UK says, "Empathy is understanding; sympathy is feeling sorry. Sympathy is not always productive. Empathy is always productive." She goes on to say, "L'Oreal sales agents who are more empathic average $100,000 more business than those without empathy. Waiters who are more empathetic average 18% more on tips than those who are not.

 

Simon Collins, Chairman of KPMG also interviewed on this video that was on Guardian says, "Businesses which care about their own people who are honest and authentic in their dealings internally often tend to project themselves as empathic organizations externally. To be viewed as an empathic organization externally, as an organization that understands your needs and tries to meet your needs is key to building up a good consumer base."

 

I am forcing a point here because understanding also deals with grappling with issues. Understanding has to do with coming to terms with one's own position on some issues, maybe not necessarily to espouse that position, but at least to understand another person's position. Empathy is understanding a situation, not necessarily having to state your position on any issue but at least understanding the issue from your perspective.

 

I've been reading about how Brendon Eich became the shortest tenured CEO in the tech world when he was CEO for just nine days. He was named CEO of Mozilla and lasted only nine days. This was surprising because he was the co-founder of the maker of Firefox. Yet he got into trouble with a stand that he had taken on the gay issue. They found out that he had made a donation to an anti-gay situation and it all began to play into his role. Sometimes we look at these situations that happen around us and think that it doesn't bother us. But it does. More and more it is beginning to play into our world. More and more, you have to come to a clear understanding of the issues that are involved. It isn't possible anymore to stick our heads in the sand and say: That doesn't concern me. It does concern you.

 

Scott McNealy, CEO of Sun Microsystems says, "In the old days, when you were being vetted for a job, the question was – Can you generate a return for shareholders? Today that question has changed. Today, more and more, people are being asked: How do you feel about gun control, immigration, gay marriage, abortion, big government, euthanasia?" More and more we are being forced to look at the issues. Here's the thing! It is not possible to look at issues objectively if you don't have empathy. Empathy is at the very center of being able to look and understand the issues that are involved.

 

That's my thought for you this morning. Empathy is crucial in relationships, for the fostering of good workspace environment, relationships – all to fuel creativity and innovation so that the businesses that we represent can do well. But empathy also has to do with understanding and knowledge that is broad-based. So I would invite you to spend some time looking at some of the current issues that are being debated today and come to an informed position on these issues. That is how you will be able to put empathy into the workplace. I pray that you would have the wisdom to be able to do that and to know how to walk in these spaces that are beginning to be so difficulty to walk in these days without ruffling feathers. But it begins by knowing where you stand on these issues. I hope and pray that you would take the time to find out.

 

Can I pray with you? Almighty God. On each one of us on this call, these are issues that are beginning to be front and center of all the things that we are doing; many issues that sometimes we don't want to deal with. Yet they are beginning to slowly filter into the work places. So we ask that You would give us the wisdom to understand situations and to make wise decisions based on our understanding of these situations. Give to each one on this call the wisdom to be able to deal wisely with these situations. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.

 

•       Simon Sinek, "Leaders Eat Last."  http://www.amazon.in/Leaders-Eat-Last-Together-Others/dp/1591845327

•       Jason Boyers, "Why Empathy is the Force that Moves Business Forward," http://www.forbes.com/sites/ashoka/2013/05/30/why-empathy-is-the-force-that-moves-business-forward/

•       Quotes by Sarah Sheilds, Executive Director & Gen Mgr, Dell, UK & Simon Collins, Chairman, KPMG in "How Empathy in the Workplace can Revolutionize Business."  http://www.theguardian.com/women-in-leadership/video/2014/aug/28/empathy-in-the-workplace

•       Stephen Shankland, "Mozilla Under Fire: Inside the 9-day reign of Fallen CEO Brendan Eich." http://www.cnet.com/news/mozilla-under-fire-inside-the-9-day-reign-of-fallen-ceo-brendan-eich/

•       Also referenced: Scott McNealy, CEO of Sun Microsystems