I was reading an article the other day that talked about three areas that categorized our lives at a very broad level. The three words were: Risk-averse, Risk-neutral and Risk-seeking. To illustrate this, the author gave the following example. Suppose Mary owes Joe $100. She says to him, "I'd be happy to pay you the $100 right now. Alternatively, you could flip a coin. If it comes up heads, I'll pay you $200 right now. If it comes up tails, I'll pay you nothing. Which do you want?" now, if Joe answers, "I don't care," he's risk-neutral. If he prefers the first option, he's risk-averse and if he prefers the second, he's risk-seeking or likes to gamble.
I looked at those three and I thought that those were good indicators of our own lives. As we go through life making decisions, we have somehow become slotted into being a particular kind of person. People who know us will say, "This person will not take a risk; he's risk-averse," or, "This person is risk-neutral. He really doesn't care." Or another person is risk-seeking; he will take a gamble or will take the double or quits decision. It all comes down to the kind of person we are and sometimes the kind of people we are over the long haul makes us into the kind of person we project to people as well. It gives us our image, our persona.
It made me think a little. As I was reading about image and leadership, I came across this quote that said, "At some point in their leadership trajectory, ambitious people must choose between image and impact, between looking powerful and empowering others. They must choose, in effect, between impersonating a leader and being one." That's a strong quote! Impact must be more important than our own image. Empowering others must be more important than us looking powerful. Being a leader must be more important than looking like a leader. Distinctions that may make a huge difference in the things that we do and the world that we live in.
It really boils down to image, our own persona and how we've crafted that over the years. That persona can sometimes work against us. If we've created a persona of being an intelligent person, then it can inhibit learning and risk-taking. We're not open to anything new. Or if we've become people who are very likeable, then it prevents us from confronting people or asking the tough questions or challenging existing norms. Or maybe we're seen as decisive people. Decisive people will often shut down feedback loops, which are so critical for us to understand who we are and what we need to hear so we can be better people.
I was speaking at a wedding over the weekend and told the couple that they needed to trust each other. Part of that trust comes with being transparent with each other. I referred to the Johari window, which I have mentioned before. These two psychologists, Joseph Luft and Harrington Ingham in 1955, came up with the Johari window. Basically, they say, it has four quadrants:
1. Arena – what you like people to know about you and what people know about you.
2. Façade – what you know about yourself and what others know about you are different. You let others know only some things while you keep other things to yourself.
3. Blind Spot – there are some things that you don't know about yourself but others know about you.
4. Unknown – the area of potential that is still untapped.
But it's these two areas, the façade and the blind spot that I feel are so important as we look at the whole idea of image. Image comes from allowing people to only see those things that we want them to see, but in doing so, we shut out the other quadrant, the blind spot, which is what other people know about us but we don't. If we don't allow a line in from those people, then that blind spot remains to our detriment. I thought that we need to be more open with people. We need to somehow give people an opportunity to speak into our lives so that our image doesn't stop with us saying, "This is who I am and this is who I'm going to portray." That's a dead end by itself. The only person who is going to improve in some very minute way is ourselves, because that's the way we think. The empowering of other people doesn't happen.
Leadership is about impact, empowering others and leading, not trying to be a leader. I wonder if that is a good thought for us to have as we start 2014. Have we got entrenched into a kind of image? Am I a risk-averse person? I don't take risks and I'm not going to change. Or risk-neutral? I don't care. It really doesn't matter. I think there's a danger with that, because when we say we don't care, then people will script our own outcomes. Or risk-seeking? Is that something that we do too much of? Have we paid for it in the future?
Being over cautious, being indifferent or throwing caution to the winds – who are you? What kind of a person are you? When you understand the kind of person you are, do you feel that you need to make a change? Is that the image that you want? Is that the kind of person who helps others realize their own potentials or has this image become a little cocoon by itself? As we look at 2014, we must move from being egocentric leaders to being other-centric leaders, where we care more about the empowerment of people, seeing people come out of shells, being who they were meant to be. That should be the goal for 2014. But for that, we need to let our image take the backseat and see what sort of impact we can make.
That was a challenge for me this morning as I was preparing to speak to you. I hope it's a challenge for you too. I pray that you would lean on the wisdom that God always gives us. I know that in this year, He is waiting and willing to afford us that wisdom to do the right things at the right time for the right kinds of people who are all around us. That's my prayer for you as we start the year 2014.
Can I pray with you? Almighty God, I pray your blessing on each one on this call. Give us the wisdom that we need to see beyond ourselves, to see opportunities, to see the needs of people around us, to be able to do what we can to empower people, to lead, as we ought to lead. Help us to be the kind of people that you want us to be so that we can bring change into a world that so desperately needs to be changed. We lean on Your understanding and Your wisdom, Lord God. We ask this prayer in the name of Jesus. Amen.
• The Bridge: Legal theory, law & Economics. http://cyber.law.harvard.edu/bridge/LawEconomics/risk.htm
• Anne Morriss, Robin J. Ely, Frances X. Frei, "Managing Yourself: Stop Holding Yourself Back." http://hbr.org/2011/01/managing-yourself-stop-holding-yourself-back/ar/2
• Johari Window, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Johari_window
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