I came across a blog by a lady called LeAnn, writing about a jockey called Kent Desormeaux, who was riding a horse called Big Brown. The stakes were high; everybody expected him to win this race. All of a sudden, midway, the jockey came to realize that there was something wrong with his horse. He looked at the finish line, which was not very far, but realized that if he pushed the horse, it could be detrimental to the health of the horse. So he decided to pull out of the race. Every one was shattered as the bets had be high, there was a lot riding on this horse coming first, including his own career and reputation. But, he made the call in the best interest of the horse.
The writer of the blog said, "Wouldn't it be great if we all had someone like that, someone who was in tune with us, enough to know when we don't have it in us anymore, or aren't able to compete or complete what everyone expects from us? Or just know that today is not our day and pull us out? That's a nice thought! Sometimes our lives are so filled with the things that we do, and we have so many things going on, so many balls in the air that life is just one buzz from one thing to another. We have no idea whether we can step aside, thinking that one of those balls is going to fall and we'll miss it. Sometimes we need people in our lives that are able to say, "You need to stop doing what you are doing. You need to take a breath of fresh air. You need to let go of some things that are taking away too much of your time and effort, increasing your stress level," and just be able to step away.
The truth is that very often, we don't have that person around us. We live our lives, lonely where we are in the corporate world and just have to keep up with the balls we have in the air, knowing that we can't step out. We may listen to motivational sayings like 'Winners never quit and quitters never win.' But, I think there is some wisdom in thinking through what we are doing in our lives, and taking a reality check. A business professor gave some good advice to a person who was starting out. He said this: "Know when to quit. Set a goal, a bench mark, a standard and make sure that everyone involved understands that if you don't hit that mark on time, then it's time to wrap up and call it a day. Learn from your failure. Otherwise," he says, "you run the risk of continually walking down the path to nowhere and you waste time, money and energy that could have been used somewhere better." Good advice! To know when to quit the project, to know when to quit a business plan, to know when things are not working and the best option is to just stop or drop it.
Some years ago, there was a controversial book, which came out based on this very same premise called 'The Dip' by Seth Godin. It's premise was that sometimes we don't know that it is more profitable and more in line with a person's balance and abilities to quit than to keep going. He says, "This is not about quitting. It's called 'Strategic Quitting'. This simply means that you can quit the project intelligently and purposefully, because you know that it is not the right objective for you and your company. As a matter of fact, you're not really quitting because you're actually moving on to something that is more relevant, more realistic, given your abilities and resources."
A lot of people believed that Michael Jordan should have stayed in retirement. He came back, joined the Washington Wizards after he had quit from the Chicago Bulls; and he never really made it. To really know when to quit whatever we are doing, whatever is stressing us out so much – not in terms of just being a quitter, but in doing a reality check on our lives and saying, "This is really not something that is adding value to my life or to the things that I'm doing in my work." Maybe it's time to very strategically say, "We need to pull the plug on this."
I don't know about you, but I've watched jugglers juggle about 6 balls in the air. I am never amazed at what they are doing. My heart is in my mouth, wondering when the first ball will drop. More often than not, we keep thinking that he is going to drop it. That's the same with us. That's the way we look at our lives, when they're crowded with too many things, and we have too many things going on in our lives.
Sheena Iyengar, a professor at the Columbian University Business School, did a study. She went into a department store and she offered one group of people samples of six different jams that were available for purchase. Then, she offered another group twenty-four different jams, which included the six jams that had been offered to the first group. With all that choice, you'd think that the group that was offered the 24 samples would be more likely to purchase one. But it was the opposite. Those in the 6-jam group turned out to be ten times more likely to purchase a jar of jam. Her premise was this: the more numerous our options, the more difficult it becomes to choose a single one. We end up choosing none at all.
Can we apply that to life? The more balls we have in the air, the more we get immobilized by them and we're not able to move forward because we are so busy juggling everything that's going on. Along with that place, comes stress. There's so much that is happening in our lives that we take on this extra stress that we don't need to take on.
Peter Bregman, writing a blog for Harvard Business Review, says, "When we get into this kind of position, it's possible we are getting overwhelmed. The key is to be able to manage to get through the situation. Come to a place of sanity." I like that phrase. I wonder how you are today. What's in store for you as you set out for the marketplace, your office, meet with clients, different people? Do you have many things going on? Is the stress level coming on? Whether it's something you enjoy or not, stress works on a person's body. We need to take a good look at the many things that we are involved in and say, "Is there something that I don't need to be handling? Are there some things that I can give up that I don't need to be doing?'
I want to leave you with 3 things on this call today.
1. Sometimes I wish our spouses were with us on this call because they would be able to look at us and say – Honey, I wish you would give up on that one. I really think that you should quit on this. Sometimes we need that permission to stop what we are doing. But maybe the call is up to you, to be able to look and think that the best thing that you could do is to cut out the things that you are doing.
2. Maybe you have too many options today and it is immobilizing you. You need to stop and say, "I'm not going anywhere. Maybe I need to cut out some of the things that I am doing."
3. Maybe it's time for some kind of course change for you. You are looking at things and thinking how your life is not going anywhere. Do you wonder if it's time to pull the plug on that and move elsewhere? I don't know where you are. I just offer this to you as three things to consider in your life.
In closing, I'd like to say this. I was going on the Golden Gate Bridge yesterday, travelling from San Francisco to the county of Marin. As I was travelling that 3km stretch, I was reading the stats on it and realized that the bridge actually moves 28 feet in the wind. Can you believe that? But the key is that when the wind comes, it gives. It doesn't stand rigidly. Tall buildings are meant to be pliant. Hooke's law applies to these tall buildings and they say that the equation is 1:500, that is, for every 100 stories, a building will move 3 feet on either side. Why is that? Because rigidity breaks. I wonder whether there is a lot of rigidity in you today, whether you just need to give a little?
That's a good thought for all of us to settle on. Do we have that little "give" in our lives to make sure that we don't break? That is always the key. I pray God will come on each one of you, my friends, that God would take these thoughts that are given to you and filter them through your own unique situations and help you to do what you need to do before anything detrimental happens to you.
May I pray with you? Almighty God, give to each one on this call the wisdom that comes only from You, the insights that only You can give and to be able to have discernment to know what things we ought give up and what things we ought to hold on to. And to be able to walk knowing that when we are walking in the will that You have for us, then 24 hours in a day is more than enough to get our time of rest, to spend time with the family and to spend time in our corporate spaces. Help us to have that balance. I ask in the precious name of Jesus. Amen.
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